I wish this demon would get out of my head. He rents space and is an ever-present judgemental bastard. I don't know if he will ever go away. Sometimes I am scared that I will never be able to silence him or contain him. I used to think that I was the strongest person I knew mentally. Now, well... I'm not so sure. I definitely didn't see taking a hit like this coming.
So here I am ... unsure of everything. I mean I'm always unsure I just am ridiculously good at hiding it and appearing confident. Confidence is definitely gone. Huge hit and I really don't know if I am going to bounce back from this. There's no anger only complete sadness constantly. anomie is more the term for how I feel.
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